Tuesday, January 22, 2019

Cub Reporter - Big Changes are Coming to the Post Drag

There are a few things fans and bettors seem to agree on - handle needs to go up, Steve Asmussen should not have cut his hair, Churchill is the Death Star, and post drags suck. Mention the words "post" and drag" and it's sure to elicit a reaction.

I got an email this morning from Cub Reporter. He asked me to keep it quiet, and said if I told anyone he'd never give me another scoop. But I know he's lying, I and can't help myself.

Anyhow, it appears things are going the other way.

"I got wind of a secret meeting with some of the biggest of big wigs," he told me. "I redacted some of it, but I have the transcript here."

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

White haired guy: "OK, all in favor, yes, let's crush Kentucky Downs. Now to item 7, the new post drag policy. Jim, go."

Jim: "Here's the new policy directive. We've worked out the logistics, and we're going to go with a 7 race card for 2019's meet. What's unique about this is that we're going to race 7 races over 7 days. We're calling it MOAPD - the Mother of all Post Drags."

Progressive guy with only some white hair: "This makes no sense Jim. What about the on-track crowd? What about the horse people?"

Jim : "No one comes to the track anymore. And we have good purses. Look, post dragging is good, why not try the ultimate post drag?"

[Bunch of guys talking "Good point, that's why we pay him, makes sense, etc"]

Jim: Here's how it will work. We'll hang zero minutes to post around 4PM, and keep it there for 24 hours. People will tune in at 4:02, bet money, thinking it's almost post time, then someone tunes in at 4:15 and does the same thing. It'll be like that for 24 full hours. Handle will explode.

"I've also been in contact with TVG. That Candice gal works the overnight. She'll be talking about the race at 0 minutes to post all night long. Cha Ching!"

"Plus, we get the overseas markets to bet. Some people watching won't even be speaking english. We can really fool them with this post drag.

White haired guy four: "I'm MAGA, but even I get the overseas stuff. Great work Jim"

White haired guy nine: "Doesn't TVG show erectile dysfunction commercials at night? They can't be for this."

Jim: "I told them we'd pull all our signals and their handle would be sleeping with the fishes."

White haired guy six : "Brilliant"

White haired guy eleven : "Won't the bettors get bored?"

Jim: "We're serving up five horse fields, they're already bored."

White haired guy: "Will other tracks follow suit when our handle explodes?"

Jim: "Yes, but we'll be first to do it, and we can make an extra few short term bucks before it all comes crashing down in a hellish inferno. "

Board members in unison: "We're all in favor, make it happen Jim"

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>


My bad satire aside, Gabe Prewitt has an excellent thread on twitter and I encourage everyone to read his feed and mentions.

It truly is a Dr. Who, Gene Roddenberry space time continuum thing. The more you hang the more money you make. If you don't hang, you can get crushed. And to fix it will require a lot of cooperation; something the sport clearly does not have.


Have a great day everyone.

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