Sunday, April 14, 2013

Brand New Post Idea: A Derby List!

I was sitting around last week and wondered why there are no Kentucky Derby lists; y'know, like a top ten or top sixteen, or whatever. They have them for sports like the NFL, NHL; they even have a top ten for Miss America Pageants. Why not the Kentucky Derby? Boy is this sport backwards.

I figured I would create a new trend right here on the blog. I don't have the following of Seth, or Ray, or Steve (Go NYRA, Wooooo!), or even the very charming Andy Serling. But maybe, just maybe, this new idea of a Derby List can help me approach their immense popularity.

Here it is, the new, exciting, groundbreaking, Pocket's Derby List ®. If anyone tries to steal this and do their own top "X" list, please beware, I will need a licensing fee.

Special note: This is so new, and so unique, people like Sheik Mo and Sid Fernando will tweet this piece to millions of their followers,it will likely appear on ESPN, the DRF and the Bacon Report, too. You might experience slow load times. Please be patient!

1. Itsmyluckyday

*Pros* - The fastest horse this year, in my opinion. I think he was flat last time and seemed to have the tank on about 7. I think a horse near the lead will win the Derby.

*Cons* - Pedigree questions. Didn't exactly look like a world beater in the Florida Derby.

2. Orb

*Pros* - Looks like he can run all day, is tractable, somewhat versatile, seems sound, has a good trainer and doesn't get too worked up.

*Cons* - Might not be fast enough; his last prep didn't exactly stun the world in the way of a fig, or a big last quarter. Tough to see a horse winning a Derby with a name that is some sort of ball. That might be nitpicking.

3. Java's War 

*Pros* - Like Orb, looks like he can run all day. Looks like a Derby horse.

*Cons* - He looks like a less professional, slightly slower, less versatile version of Orb. Might break poorly and be closing from 20th. No worries if so, because people on twitter can just blame Julien.

4. Goldencents

*Pros* - Much to some bettors surprise, perhaps, he handled the 72 hour security at Santa Anita. He has speed and looks like they'll use it, trying to be this years Bodemeister, without a Trinniberg to contend with. I wouldn't blame them, maybe he can run away and hide. Top LO Beyer has won 6 of the last twenty one Derby's.

*Cons* - Do you want to bet a horse with a tricked up fig on a souped up track which might cause an underlay? Lexington is not big enough to offset the Louisville cash on this hoss.

5. Normandy Invasion

*Pros* - I was watching Patton last month on AMC one night and figured he'd be betting this colt with both fists. Not really a pro, more of a feeling. This horse looks like he hasn't been cranked up yet, so there's room for improvement.

*Cons* - A bit of a wise guy horse I think, and sometimes those stink to bet.

6. Lines of Battle

*Pros*- I have no idea. You just have to put him somewhere, because this year's crop ain't running 110 beyers.

*Cons* - Daddy Long Legs. What a bad bet. The Dubai-Derby winner ROI is worse than betting a Pletcher horse.

7. Mylute 

*Pros* - He looked decent in the Lousiana Derby and could move forward off of it. Good trainer who knows what he's doing.

*Cons* - Should've won the Louisiana Derby. 

8. Overanalyze 

*Pros* - Only two preps, same as Super Saver. Has a fast fig. Might peak for the Derby.

*Cons* -  Do we really want to bet a Pletcher horse?

9. Palace Malice

*Pros* - Has to be ahead of Revolutionary, because I think he dusts him easily in Louisiana if he doesn't get bounced around like a three year old at a Chuck E Cheese birthday party. Has some speed and talent it appears.

*Cons* - How did he lose the Blue Grass if he's any good? Do we really want to bet a Pletcher horse?

10. Will Take Charge

*Pros* - Obviously has some go. If you don't use a D. Wayne Lukas horse on a list like this you are not a horse racing fan. It's like having a top ten TV detective list and not using Columbo.

*Cons* - What's up with the mile works? Is DWL trying to confuse other trainers? Is he trying to throw us off to cash a big superfecta? The potential mystery involved is perplexing.

11. Vyjack

*Pros* - That was quite the talented move in the Gotham. He has a great name. A Derby-worthy name for sure. He might've been sick in the Wood and if he races that well while sick, look out. Joe Drape's favorite horse.

*Cons* - He seemed to struggle in the last sixteenth off a great trip. Sickness excuses are sometimes just lame excuses, developed from generations of trainerspeak.

12. Verrazano Verazzano (I always spell it wrong, just like Leriosdexendesoromeaux)

*Pros* - He has not lost a race. An imposing physical presence, like the dude on the cover of a romance novel, except he's a horse.

*Cons* - He looks as green as grass. I like that he is running figs with this greenness, but in Kentucky with a 20 horse field and a big crowd it could be a recipe for a last place finish (but I will use him 12th). And of course, do we really want to bet a Pletcher horse? He's tied with Apollo.

There's the "Derby Top 12". Thanks for your patience, especially with these slow load times. Have a great Monday everyone!!!!


Cangamble said...

How come Incognito didn't make your list?

Heidi E. Carpenter said...

You should check out the photos of the Derby contenders that The Downey Profile posted on Twitter. Normandy Invasion looks worse for the wear since the Wood, but Verrazano looks freaking fantastic!

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